Duck Heads

When my friend Mark David Elliot, who writes a blog called LikeALocal.cn about Shanghai food, especially cheap eats and street food, called to suggest we do lunch on Shouning Road, my initial reaction was "uh, don't you know how much I hate Shanghai cuisine? Haven't I made myself clear?" [here. and here.]. But I'm also eager to be proven wrong, at least once, about Shanghai food. Mark has a lot of experience running around town checking out the real deal local food, so I agreed to meet him for lunch on Shouning Lu, which is known for small divey restaurants and street food vendors.



First we found a tiny place with a small display of oysters, clams, mussels, and scallops. These were already opened and left out on a tray sitting on the sidewalk in the sun (or lack there of, it's Shanghai after all). I found this disconcerting -- the raw meat was collecting dust and pollution and warm, dry air. Then a fellow stopped by on a bicycle and dumped a big bag of muddy mess right on the street in front of us, and hosed it off to reveal large oysters. I ordered one of these and had it placed, open face, right on top of hot coals. They covered it with a huge glop of raw minced garlic mixed with green herbs. This turned out to be reasonably toothsome, but it's not particularly Shanghainese food.



We then found a vendor who served us a deep-fried battered pork chop on top of two deep-fried rice cakes (actually like a 6-inch by 2-inch thick rice noodle). Topped with vinegar, this really reminded us of UK-style fish and chips, except for the absolutely nasty sweet brown gravy they added -- that's the Shanghai way -- I would ask them to hold it next time.



Then we spotted a few curbside woks ready for action. The vendors have a variety of noodles or rice, and a big selection of ingredients and sauces that you can order as you wish. We watched a few others order and knew what to do. I ordered a fried rice, and restrained the chef from adding anything sweet or syrupy, and held the powdered MSG to just a teaspoon. I also encouraged her to add extra chili spice. I could tell the chef was a little annoyed that I was micro-managing her cooking, but it was worth it. The fried rice was palatable, but unlike any I'd had in Shanghai, because I'd more or less put it together myself. The only thing I could not change is the quality of the ingredients, most importantly the cooking oil, which is, I believe, half of what's wrong with Shanghai food.



We also found a man dumping dry corn meal into a machine that pooped out a stream of puffed corn, with a little knife that spun around rapidly to cut the puff stream into little bite-sized nuggets. Tasted like parcel packing foam.



We'd given up on finding anything particularly "weird" on the street when we turned a corner and found a shop specializing in odd duck parts. We ordered a couple whole duck heads. They're just full, cooked, and lightly seasoned heads of duck, which are partially split in the center, so you can crack them open and dig out the inner bits like the brains and cartilage, and uh, whatever else exists inside a duck's head. We didn't get much to munch on inside, but the thin skin covering the head and bill was tasty, even if it required a lot of little nibbling and tearing with our front teeth. There were also duck tongues and webbed feet and other duck parts, but we've had most of the other stuff before. The duck heads, meh, the skin was tasty but a lot of work for very little to chew on. Still, we appreciate that these parts are not going to waste. Here's a few photos of us eating duck heads:

Odd duck parts; duck heads.

Buying duck heads.

Duck tries to escape, head first.

Eat the skin.

Crack the head.

Anthony Bourdain's "A Cook's Tour"

The subtitle is "Global Adventures in Extreme Cuisines" but the real goal is a mildly macho food travel show, not shock value. We like Mr. Bourdain -- he's funny, idiosyncratic, and opinionated. But why is he whining like a wussy when he has to eat bird's nest soup, natto, or mountain potato? We've eaten all these things in our home country, America, and we didn't freak out about it, even long before we began the Weird Meat Project. Our favorite suburban sushi chef dishes out natto and mountain potato all the time, and plenty of white people eat it and even ask for it. I even cook with satoimo mountain potato or yamaimo mountain yam at home, my local grocer carries them in California. They're white and slimey like semen, but we like how the stuff soaks up sauces and provides a unique contrasting texture on top of a crunchy or chewy dish.



Natto we like for breakfast. We buy small cases of it in the frozen section. It is kind of a chore to eat it without being messy, but the flavor is worth it, especially mixed with hot mustard and MSG broth. It also feels nourishing and healthy and we know that's not macho, but whatever, we like a dose of good-for-us-ness from time to time. Like listening to jazz.

We agree with Jeffrey Steingarten's method of trying everything multiple times before deciding if it's good or not. We've tried a lot of food that didn't impress us on the first try, and kept an open mind about it. Give it another go. Taste is acquired. There are millions of people who enjoy natto -- are you sure it's bad after one try? What about from a different chef or producer, or in a different setting?

Now, we have found some things that are simply bad, even after many many tries and in different settings. As we've mentioned many many times before, Shanghainese food is one of these sad bad things -- it's just not good. And even though we shrugged off warnings from Chinese and foreign friends alike, we finally have to admit that there is nothing, absolutely nothing, good about baijiu. Báijiǔ is the strong, sweet clear wine that is to China what vodka is to Russia or sake is to Japan. Tastes like gasoline with sugar.



Speaking of disgusting things, I guess I'm obsessed, but I was "treated" to another Shanghainese meal the other night. Shanghainese food is sadistic. One dish, for example, was ... pork cuts, deep-fried with crunchy corn meal. Over that, they poured a sickly sweet mayonaise, and then -- the horror -- they sprinkled those little rainbow-sprinkles that kids like to put on cheap ice cream sundaes. It doesn't get weirder than that, nor more unpalatable. Give me natto! There's a lot of talk about the joys of mixing east and west cuisines, but this is what they came up with?

Raw Sheep's Heart and Horse Meat

We were approached by a globe-trotting freelance videographer working with Current TV (Al Gore's new TV network in the USA) who wanted to film and interview the Weird Meat Experience.

We took the guy out for the live drunken shrimp at Shanghai Ren Jia -- only to find out they'd taken it off the menu (at this particular location -- it's still at the others). So we promised the following night we'd get some real juicy bits at the Uygar restaurant on Shanxi Nan Lu (Shanxi South Road) at Yanan Lu. Well, our luck was just plain out this week, and we turned up looking foolish and without footage. All the cool stuff was off the menu that night. No penis. No lamb's head. No camel hoof. Nothing fun, exciting, adventureous or disgusting. At least not worth filming.



Raw Sheep's Heart with bell peppers

They did, however, have appetizers of "raw sheep's heart" and "raw horse meat". Now, these do sound fun and adventurous, but they turned out to be "cured," not necessarily "raw". So the horse meat was like Italian ham, and the raw sheep's heart was like slices of liver pate. Not exciting on camera. Both were quite delicious, and we ordered seconds of each. The horse meat tasted quite familiar, and if someone told me it was a darker, richer Canadian bacon ham, I'd believe them. Could be good on a pizza or sandwich. Incidently, I've had horse meat before, in Japan, and in south Italy, and it's a popular dish in the south of France... (check out this guy's rant about horse meat.)

The Uigars live primarily in western China, mostly Xinjiang province. They're Muslim -- no pork on the menu -- and their most well-known menu items are the flat round fresh baked breads (resemble thick pizza crusts) and skewered lamb meat kebabs (yang rou chan). You can find Xinjiang food in most cities around China. In fact, it's trendy now for young adults and college students to have Xinjiang food, and you'll always see portable lamb skewer guys standing outside popular nightclubs -- as drunks like to have a hangover-cure munchie before heading home.



Horse meat

These street vendors do an amazing trick -- they're not legal, so when the cops are coming, they grab their BBQ tray, fold it up, and make a run for it. It's all so fast and efficient, like a magic trick. Often they just run around the block real quick and set up again like nothing happened, and your kebab is still cooking and almost ready to eat. Should be an olympic sport!



Anyway, at this Uigar restaurant, they do a nightly song and dance routine on a stage, and try to embarrass customers by turning them into unwilling volunteers. Only once have I allowed myself to be embarrassed like this -- it was Halloween and I was dressed as a Chinese army general, feeling festive with several bottles of tasty Xinjiang Black Beer in my belly.

So the sheep's heart and horse ham were quite innocuous -- pleasent and familiar to the palate and sight of any Westerner, as long as they don't know what it is. We applaud anyone who doesn't waste good meat, whether it's weird or not. But these items tasted really good and familiar, and fulfilled our need for protein.

* I've used several spellings Uighur, Uygar and Uigar, because, well, they're both used often, regardless of what's currently proper.

Shanghai Restaurants: Top 10 Favorites

(or ... 10 Restaurants in Shanghai That Don't Suck)

WeirdMeat received a lot of feedback about our public disapproval of Shanghai cuisine. Some good, some bad, but no one (as of this writing) has offered any solution or suggestion that there is something good about Shanghai cuisine. Maybe we're right? Seems like they even admit it. We've challenged many a Shanghai friend to find us a decent Shanghainese meal, but they always suggest Sichuan or Cantonese or Xinjiang food. (I'll write about Xinjiang food soon, you'll be delighted to hear about the texture of raw sheep heart and the vertical penis tasting!)

[enter generic pic of shanghai skyline]

One popular Shanghai dish, for example, is ... pork cuts, deep-fried with a crunchy corn meal coating. Over that, they pour a sickly sweet mayonnaise, and then -- the horror -- they sprinkle those little rainbow-sprinkles that kids like to put on cheap ice cream sundaes.

Another example -- for breakfast -- they have these street food vendors that make crepes. The crepes are very greasy -- squeeze them and yellow oil pours out like it's a sponge. But it's the combination of what goes inside that's revolting -- sugary-sweet thick brown gravy, bits of fried pork, green onions, pickled vegetables, eggs, and then more sugar spooned on top. Beverage of choice? How about some chocolate milk? Mmmm. I guess you might want something to get the bowels moving in the morning, but isn't this a bit extreme?

But ... we've been living in Shanghai for several years now, so we've found a way to survive the dining scene here, (partly by making several trips a year to other cities to make sure we're not just jaded).

WeirdMeat was previously a restaurant critic -- here and in the States -- for (don't say it) more reputable publications, and we've done a bit of globetrotting, so we've had a lot of experience eating all sorts of cuisines. Mom's an eclectic cook too, we grew up eating all sorts of yummy homemade food, from falafel to fajitas to fufu to fun chow. We know good food, no matter where it's from.

So here's a list our current favorite 10 restaurants in Shanghai. Shanghai's a big place, so this isn't a list of what I feel are the "best," because I haven't tried enough to make that judgment. But these places are good. (Not in order, just a list). And we'll update this when it's necessary...

1. Charmant (Taiwanese Chinese) - Also see Bellagio, 3 locations, which appears to be the inspiration for Charmant. They're all pretty good. Taiwanese takes on various Chinese cuisines, the desserts are stand-outs. Excellent service. Affordable but nice enough for just about any occasion short of a honeymoon. Corner of Huaihai and Fuxing xi lu.

2. Hengshan Cafe (Cantonese) - Despite the frequent service break-downs, the food here is some of the best homestyle Cantonese food we've had anywhere. The daily soups are darn cheap but the best in town -- hearty and comforting. Some things are a miss on this menu, including the BBQ meats that are showcased, but there's enough good stuff on the menu here to warrant frequent visits. 308 Hengshan lu, plus new locations.

3. Lisboa Macau Restaurant (Macau) - Macau-style food, a brilliant blend of Cantonese and Portuguese. So much good stuff on this menu, from the won-ton soup to the African chicken. The ice milk coffee is so delicious but will keep you awake for a day or two. Inside the Times Square building basement on Huaihai Lu.

4. Casanova/Velvet Lounge (Pizza/Italian) - Sorry, Jimix got the axe, after 4 recent disappointing visits. We think the best pizza in Shanghai is at Casanova above the Velvet Lounge. They got other good Italian dishes here too, like pastas and salads, and they get extra points for pouring a decent house red in a full size glass. Julu lu @ Changshu lu.

5. Vedas (north Indian) - The best Indian food we've had in China, and it's even better than almost all the North Indian restaurants we went to in America. Jianguo xi lu near Wulumuqi lu.

6. Shanghai Uncle (Shanghai fusion) - OK we wanted to put at least one "Shanghai" style food on the list. This place is so much more evolved (sorry!) than any other Shanghai style food we've had, locals probably wouldn't even recognize the fresh ingredients and colorful, flavorful seasoning. Several locations.

7. Saleya (French bistro) - We love this place! It's a quiet little colorful bistro, so classic, and it's affordable enough for a weekly visit. The duck confit and creme brulee are tops in the town. Changle lu near Xiangyang lu.

8. Yuxin (Sichuan Chinese) - After trying all the Sichuan places, this new-comer kicks it! The tea-smoked duck is similar to but far superior to Peking Duck, imho. And the water-cooked fish is the best. Inside the STV tower on Weihai lu.

9. Rendezvous (Singapore/Penang Malaysian) - Closed. Too bad. They turned into a Thai restaurant last month and it's horrible, completely nasty.

9. Southern Barbarian (Yunnan Chinese) - Yes! Finally. The other Yunnan restaurants in Shanghai didn't do it for us (with the exception of a few fine dishes at Lost Heaven). Southern Barbarian opened their new location on Maoming, north of Ruijin lu. Affordable, friendly, yummy!

10. House of Canton (Dim Sum). 4th floor of Isetan shopping mall on Nanjing Xi Lu. Despite the generic, old-school sounding name, this place is modern and minimally gorgeous, and very civilized. The dim sum here is our current favorite in town. While the menu is short, everything is top notch and reasonably priced, especially considering the atmosphere, service, and quality.

... still looking. Got any recommendations? Send a comment!

P.S. Found an interesting article about the history of Shanghai cuisine, but I'm unconvinced there's a renaissance of new, good food going on here ... yet. Read the article.

If you know of any lists of Best Shanghai Restaurants, or just want to share your favorites, post in the comments below...

Bird's Nest

The genteel name is "bird's nest," but after our investigation, we found that you're not actually eating the nest, you're eating the bird's "spit" or "saliva." Well, maybe not YOU, per say, but people who do.

These people are beautiful. They stay young and fresh and have perfect facial skin. That's what the stuff claims to do for you, at least.

I'm young and fresh and beautiful too, but this was my first time eating bird's nest. I'd had the convenience store bird's nest drink a few times, in Thailand, for example, but I've been told those drinks are mostly fake. But then last month I saw a new restaurant open on WanPing Nan Lu here in Shanghai, called Yanzhiwu Edible Birds' Nest - "Enjoy the life in birds' nest!". (Apparently bird's nest can make you beautiful, but it doesn't help with your grammar). Coincidently, my young and fresh and beautiful assistant Coco mentioned, only a day later, that I ought to try bird's nest soup.

So we set a date, and canceled it a few times, until we found a civilized time to eat the spit.

The place isn't really a restaurant. It's a shop. A shop with a few tables and a menu, so you can try the bird's nest in a variety of exotic ways -- sweet soups, savory soups, desserts. We ordered two kinds -- one with medicinal fruits, the other with blood. Well, it's not actual blood, but that's what they call it in poetic Chinese (and translation on the menu), because of the dark red color.

The birds are called swiflets, and they live in SouthEast Asia, with the most prized birds living in Indonesia. The brochure claims swiflet spit is good for cell growth, elderly people, the lungs and pancreas, and for women that want to look attractive.

Bird vomit, er uh, spit, is not cheap. The prices at Yangzhiwu range from $22 USD for a small colorless clump to over $1,600 USD a box of highest grade dark red "blood spit." I wanted to know why the prices ranged so much. "Higher quality means higher price" was about all I could get out of the lazy staff there. How does one know which bird spit is better and others? "Oh, yes, this one is better!"

I recommended to the manager that she ought to feed her staff some of the ginseng and gingko enhanced bird spit soups on the menu, reportedly brain-enhancers, and a routine of calisthenics, but my possibly only slightly smart ass suggestions went ignored, I fear.

Anyway, we sat down to eat the stuff. The texture is like shark's fin, that other expensive and controversial delicacy. Doesn't really have a taste in itself, which is why it's always served in a savory, or more often, sweet soup. But that's not the point. You will look all shiney and young if you eat this stuff. If you believe.

Snake Bites Back

Sorry for the delay since last post, trust us we've got some fun stuff coming up soon -- we ate bird vomit, and finally we've solved the mystery of the "winter worm, summer plant" -- but here's a quick bite, er, link to an article about Shanghai's hospitals warning residents to watch out for snake bites. These snakes are intended to be eaten by humans, but sometimes they bite first!

Thanks to Shanghaiist for providing the tip.

Sea Horse Soup

My assistant Coco was chatting up WeirdMeat to a Guangdong-ese friend of hers and they suggested we go to a traditional Chinese medicine shop and get some dried seahorses.



I've always thought sea horses were cute little bizarre animals. I learned that it's actually the male sea horse that gets pregnant and carries the babies, from watching indie rock band Yo La Tengo play a live performance set to the films of Jean Painleve -- an underwater cinematographer from the 1930s or something. Real stoney stuff.

Anyway, the Cantonese make a medicinal soup with dried seahorse. Good for the facial skin and a restorative detox/cleanser. I happen to be blessed with perfect facial skin, but I could always use a little detoxing. So we found 4 seahorses -- 2 pregnant males, and 2 females (virgins?) -- and put them in a soup with carrots, ginger, and some pork stock.



The broth had a salty and pleasantly pungent oceanic flavor. The seahorses were just thrown in dry and lent their flavor and magical medicinals to the mix. And they still looked cute.

Have you ever looked at a seahorse? They have a boxey body shape, the profile of a horse's face skeleton, and a tail that curls inward towards the belly and head. They also have these perfectly symmetrical little bone spikes sticking out (like the Hellrasiser guy) that make them very difficult to eat. That's when I asked the question -- are we actually suppose to eat these? How? A few desperate calls to the medicine shop and some random Guangdong-ese comrads didn't help -- no answer. But we could taste the things from the soup broth. I did manage to extract small bits of meat from the softer part of the tails, and from the pregnant bellies of the males, and found it reminded me of dried scallops, but more salty and less complex.



There's all kinds of weird stuff I want to try in traditional Chinese medicine (TCM). One that really intrigues me is this little worm thing that every Chinese person I've talked to tells me, begins life as a plant, and then turns into an animal species. Or vice versa. That's impossible, I tell them. Something lost in translation perhaps?

Why is everything in TCM good for male virility? Is there anything in TCM that isn't? What do I take if I've got too much male virility? I suppose if male humans got pregnent like the male seahorse, we'd be a bit less horny, you think?