New Year's Resolution

Years ago during a drunken new year everyone was chatting up their resolutions, the usual stuff, getting more exercise, eating healthy, blah blah blah. I couldn't handle it. I announced that I was going to pick up a new vice instead of a virtue.

So I tried smoking cigarettes. I never had before, so it felt exciting and enjoyably reckless, but it only lasted 2 weeks. I found it a to be a chore, going to buy smokes, trying to find that lost lighter, having to wash clothes more often... I just got lazy about it and after those 2 weeks of being a smoker, I sort of forgot to get around to it.

I still try to pick a new vice every year, if for nothing else, to get some laughs in the middle of those annual resolution (yawn) chats at the office. In subsequent years I tried pot smoking (lasted longer than 2 weeks but still didn't really get into it), eating more red meat, eating more cheese, drinking more red wine, eating more chocolate (this is probably the only resolution that's still going strong after years), being more of a perv in bed, petty shoplifting, reading comics, playing video games, staying up all night once a month, gambling, leaving restaurants without paying when the food and service totally sucks... and one year I chose to "eat more weird meat" and that eventually turned into this blog.

I missed the deadline this year. I couldn't think of a vice I hadn't done yet. Any ideas? Leave a comment...